shame shame

I have been scolded, mildly, twice today so far and its only 2pm. Shucks. The first was this morning at the 7-11. I ran in to pick up a soda and on my way out this bike cop with the cop sunglasses on (respect mah authoritay!) said something I guess but I didn't hear so just walked right by. And then he tapped his stupid baton thing on the column (no, no idea why 7's has columns) to get my attention, and says, ma'am, do you know what you did wrong? And I'm all, um, left my house without makeup? And he says no, you made a left turn across 2 solid yellow lines. Now, I can't really explain to you why this makes no sense at this particular intersection and I can't figure out how to imbed a drawing so youre just going to have to trust me this made no sense. Ok, I'll try. Basically there is a residential street (off which I live) that ends up at an intersection with a larger street, with a light. It splits into four lanes (two each way) right as it gets to the light. So your situation is that you are at a light, and are either in the left turn lane or the right. There is no straight. Ok, so imagine, right at this light there also happen to be two small strip malls, housing 7-11, dry cleaners, so forth. The entrances to both of these strip malls come off that residential street approximately 2-3 car lengths back from the intersection. You dig? The double yellow lines completely cover the length of both entrances. Meaning, the double lines extend farther past the intersection than the driveways to the strip malls do. Bascially, you cannot make a left into the stripmall on the left without crossing said double lines. So I say to the cop, UM, HUH? and he tries to explain, and I'm all, ok, sure, um, THOSE yellow lines there? Do you understand my issue with your explanation here? I acutally said, "are you allowed to turn left into here at all?" I'm still so not understanding what his point was, but I said, Ok, I'll make sure to watch that. Whatever.

And then, fun, I opened my office door this morning and stepped on a piece of paper (hate that, stop sliding shit under my door) and its all blue and in a nice font and seriously, this is what it says....

"Hello neighbors,
We have a very small favor to ask that we think will make a big impact on the appearance of the hallways and are seeking your help.

Each evening we put our trash cans out in the hall to be emptied and each day a great many of them remain in the hall. First impressions make such an impressions on our visitors and on all of us.

Please join our team campaign, that takes little effort and bring your trash can into your office. If you (sic) neighbor is not there, please be a good neighbor and bring their can into their office for them.

This may take some time to be 100% but the impact will be well worth the effort."


Seriously, CANNOT stop laughing. This is what consultants are paid to do people, THIS is what matters. bwahahahaha.